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Oh my goodness me life is so good right now. For this whole entire year I have felt on a knife's edge for one reason or another but suddenly everything has resolved itself!

I started this year pretty down in the dumps. I had a tonne of resolutions which were so unachievable and out there; like I really didn't consider whether a massive crash diet was a good idea during A level year. Very silly. Also school was really hotting up for exams and I just didn't feel ready; it was such a stressful time.

Then early in the year (I think it was around april but I've honestly forgotten) I had to go in for my dental surgery. I don't have many adult teeth because for some reason they never grew so I had always had baby teeth which would fall out soon and leave behind wierd gum gaps, not super pretty. I'd been waiting to have dental implant surgery for about 6 years so it was really wierd when it finally came round. I can honestly say it was one of the most traumatising things EVER. If there is a chance that you may have this surgery and you can go with another option GO WITH ANOTHER OPTION. I had to sit for six hours, awake while they drilled very deep into may face. I couldn't feel any pain but my the pressure was horrible and everytime I opened my eyes I saw four surgeons covered in blood leaning over me. It was very scary.

The recovery period was pretty long for the surgery. I ended up missing a lot of school which made me very depressed and that in turn made me miss more school. On top of this I had to (and still have to) wear false teeth which feels pretty humiliating and is just no good for self esteem). All the while I was being reminded that this was the most important year of my life which just made it so much worse. It was very hard to get life into perspective when your loved ones are telling you to focus on recovery and everyone else is telling you that your entire life with be impacted if you don't work.

So just before my exams I had my second operation. It was a grueller and took a long time. It exhausted me and just made me too tired to do anything for while. I think I literally had a week to revise for my exams.

So I took my exams feeling totally unsure about them and really iffy and just doubting myself the whole way through. And then it was just a waiting game. This was so terrible. I had so many things to look foward to; me and George's trip to Europe, buying all my things for uni, summer; but I just couldn't enjoy anything as it all seemed to sort of hang in the balance.

Until today! This morning I received my confirmation that I had been successfully admitted into the university of Edinburgh and suddenly everything just feels fine. It's amazing. I hadn't realised the burden I had been carrying. I JUST  received my results and I got AAB which I'm really proud of considering I missed so much school. But the important thing is that suddenly I can be excited about going to my dream uni! And suddenly I can get excited about travelling (IN TWO DAYS!) and I'm getting used to my teeth now, even though they are still false, and I'm well aware that in a month or so I will have proper non-removable teeth which I'm pretty syched about! Anyway. Today is a happy day. And it feels like the rest of the year is just sort of sorted now. Yay.




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